Author: Javier Dangleport

WhatWhat: Miserably married dude who hates Mondays works at sex toy multinational; tries to impress the gloriously mustached company partners by fucking Rex Tyron, a new client, in order to seal an important deal. Also, the Illuminati are dinosaurs.

Disturbing Quote:

My wife was throwing dishes, screaming about how I had no initiative, how I didn’t even have the balls to grow a decent business mustache that would prove once and for all I had the business stones to move up in the company. (loc. 29)

Yikes. Also, what?

sealing the deal

Money Quote:

He tried to reach for it, to stroke it, but his stunted little T-rex arms were too short to reach it. (loc. 121)

Until this moment, I had never given proper consideration to the difficulties facing horny T-rexes. And after today I hope I never have to think about it again.

Verdict: This one shows more deference to basic dinosaur anatomy than most (though I still wonder about the SIZE issues). Even more strikingly, all the dialogue is punctuated correctly! Scoop it up. The last paragraph alone makes it worth it.