Author: Chuck Tingle. As if you didn’t know.

What What: Aaron Duncan outs himself as human, thereby becoming the first openly human player in the Unicorn Football League, and his human-curious teammates celebrate by fucking him.

…What? Sorry, can’t help you. That’s the plot.

No, I cannot explain to you why a human could pass as a unicorn, or why only that one reporter in the press scrum thinks to ask him if he’s human.

gay unicorn football squad

Money Quote: It’s a toss up between this:

But as unicorn music became more popular and began to invade the conservative homes of modern America, people started to take notice of this incoming foreign influence. (5%)

And this:

I may be openly gay, but the world at large can never know I’m not actually a unicorn. (8%)

Verdict: Well, it has a happy ending. Plus an orgy. So if you pour yourself a stiff drink and just lie back and accept that some hornless non-furry mane-free biped could somehow pass as a unicorn, this is entertaining. Confusing as hell, but entertaining.