Title: Lured by the Loch Ness Monster

Author: Cassidy Beach

lured by the loch ness monster

WhatWhat: Andrea and her friends, studying abroad in Scotland, take a weekend trip to the Highlands, where she has sex with the Loch Ness monster.

Money Quotes:

That was the big difference between boys back home in America and Scotland. The ones in Scotland were so scrawny! I thought after seeing Braveheart that Scotland would be a country full of huge, manly, strapping men. But not so! None of the boys here seemed to have any interest in going to the gym. (loc 36)

While bringing my pussy to orgasm with the steam from his nostrils, Nessie began playing with my breasts with his giant flipper. His body wasn’t cold and fish-like, it was warm. His warm flipper rubbed my tits up and down and left and right, heating them up. (loc 242)

Verdict: Impeccably captures both the American experience of being “abroad” and the various reasons people there find American tourists annoying. The girl who’s slept with nine locals, and calls them all “William Wallaces,” the narrator’s observation that men in Scotland are all scrawny, their purchasing and wearing kilts: it’s all here. Amazing. It’s competently written and enjoyable, provided you don’t have to deal with tourists in your daily life (if you do, the accurate depictions might prove grating).