I can’t believe that this is the second time I’ve reviewed something featuring living corn.

Title: Living Corn James Corny Fired in the Butt

Author: Chuck Tingle

living corn

WhatWhat: Dimald Trimp is the corrupt head of the American Agriculture Agency, and he needs to fire “the handsome living corn in charge of ethics investigations” because he’s been showing an interest in Dimald’s “connection to sentient Russian beets.” Yes, I’m directly quoting the Amazon description there.

Money Quotes:

James Corny is a handsome living corn on the cob who has been around for years. (loc 3)

I mean, there’s not a lot I can add to that.

I glance up at the vegetable in confusion. “How did you know that?”

“The whole room is bugged,” explains the beet in his thick accent. “For both our protection.” (loc 63)

I’m having unpleasant flashbacks to make borscht. God, that last election cycle was nearly the death of me.

Anyway, getting back to the need to fire James Corny:

“All terminations of high ranking officials by the head of the American Agricultural Agency shall be done from within their own butt,” the living corn recites. (loc 106)

For all I know that’s how it’s done, yup. I mean, it could be.

Eventually, the entire passageway widens into a lush green valley with hills and trees. (loc 188)

Be sure to consult your proctologist if the entire passageway widens into a lush green valley with hills and trees.

Verdict: Politics go better with butter, always. Even extremely partisan politics involving weird butt realms.