review: Amber’s Big Exam

Title: Amber’s Big Exam

Author: Raven Dawes

amber's big exam

WhatWhat: Amber’s stepfather caught her kissing the boy next door, so obviously she’s ready for some deep dicking by said stepfather, only first he has to have her pawed over by two doctors who used to be his college roommates, because why the hell not.

Money Quotes:

I’m not saying I’ll forbid it forever, but right now, I need to help you figure out how to enjoy your body in a safe way.” (loc 39)

By which he means “have unprotected sex with me and two guys I know.”

Of course, my step-daddy knew what was best, and if these men were like my step-daddy, they knew what was good for little girls. (loc 51)

Just to clarify, according to the first page of this she’s nineteen. If that, you know, helps.

Maybe these lessons will make more sense when they’re coming from the nice doctor men. (loc 51)

“My, my,” he said, “What a nice diaper cover your daddy put you in this morning. I need to get one for my little girl. Now lift up your bottom and let me take it off for you.” (loc 305)

Suddenly I miss the Omegaverse stories. Also I need a drink.

Verdict: For a while I kept banging my head on the “Wait, how do these guys not end up getting sued for malpractice?” reality threshold, and then I talked myself into letting go of the real world and accepting that this is an alternate universe where two grown men can afford to be letting this go on in their clinic for whatever reason. Maybe in the universe of this story ABDL is the dominant social paradigm and this is all completely normal and what am I even worrying about, I should just have another drink.

review: The Doctors and the Omega: Shifter Fertility Exam

Title: The Doctors and the Omega: Shifter Fertility Exam

Author: Canis Blackfang

the doctors and the omega

WhatWhat: Everett is desperate to come up with the rent money, and lucky for him he lives in dogfuck rapeworld the omegaverse, and he’s an omega, so all he has to do is participate in a fertility experiment. Yay?

I’m not going to lie to you: when I recently reviewed Night Shifter Nurses, I horrified various and sundry friends and family SO MUCH that I immediately vowed to inflict more Omegaverse on them, and Canis Blackfang has hands-down the best covers, titles, and pseudonym in that subcategory, so here we are.

Money Quotes:

I was no longer a virgin. An alpha had dumped his semen into my omega womb. (loc 219)

The receptionist had sounded normal enough on the phone, a female werewolf, but I still had this paranoia that I was about to get slain for my kidneys. (loc 91)

I guess “normal” is relative.

It reminded me of when I was younger, richer and still being chased by all the prospective alpha mates. I let out a small sigh. If only I hadn’t played hard to get so much I might be mated now to some rich alpha and not be in this mess. (loc 98)

I know “heteronormativity” probably isn’t the word I want to apply here, since this is m/m omega shifter erotica, but holy crap, that sounded like the marriage advice I’ve heard from cynical women of my grandmother’s generation.

Verdict: A few typos and a painful absence of the Oxford comma, but neither were enough to throw me out of the story. If Omegaverse fic is your thing, or medical kink, you’ll enjoy this. If “omegaverse” is just a funny-looking word and you don’t actually know what I’m talking about, think of it as “involuntary BDSM wolves” and try it anyway.

The fertility test, by the way? “You can tell by the taste,” apparently. (loc 152)

review: The Doctor Will See You Now

Title: The Doctor Will See You Now

Series: Bearapy

Author: Rosabel Darke

the doctor will see you now

WhatWhat: Since becoming a werewolf Theo has been avoiding intimacy with his wife, Samantha, so now the couple are seeking therapy from Doctor Drake Bennett, who is himself a bear shifter. He solves their problems by fucking Samantha in front of her husband. Sounds legit.

Money Quotes:

She spread her legs even wider, baring herself fully to the bear, and slowly rubbed her clit as she stared into his eyes, daring him. (loc 270)

Verdict: Bear erotica is a Thing, and I hear cuckhold stories are hugely popular, so this should do well. And I hope it does, because it was literate, entertaining, and clever. Not quite my kink, and I still liked it enough to want to read the sequels.

Doctor Unicorn’s Secret Mistress

Title: Doctor Unicorn’s Secret Mistress

Author: Ivory Gothic

If Lisa Frank illustrated erotica...
I’m strangely reminded of my childhood Lisa Frank obsession.

Summary: Innocent virgin Chelsea Blandford finds herself in a very exclusive hospital, under the care of arrogant unicorn Doctor Travan Shinestab. Will she submit to his demands and endure his highly unusual treatment?