review: Deep South Wolves 2: Hunter’s Creek

Title: Deep South Wolves 2: Hunter’s Creek

Author: Kaden Mallory

deep south wolves 2

WhatWhat: Kage and Jason go to a gay bar to pick up a guy, only Jason is in wolf form (Kage explains this away as “he’s a service dog”). Kage fucks the guy under a bridge, and then Jason mounts him. Yes: the guy they pick up is in for not just surprise buttsex, but surprise bestiality.

Money Quotes:

Even as he was pulling out, Jason surged up onto the man’s back. He clamped both forepaws around Daniel’s waist.

“What the fuck?” Daniel, also breathless and wet with sweat, tried to scramble away.

Jason snarled and bit down on the back of Daniel’s neck, his head turned sideways for a firm hold. (loc 166)

Verdict: I’m amazed that this actually went to the dogdick place. I mean, I know all werewolf erotica and omegaverse stuff is damned close at the best of times, but this kicked it up a notch. Or a knot, I suppose.

review: Omega Destined: Billionaire’s Secret

Title: Omega Destined: Billionaire’s Secret

Author: Canis Blackfang

omega destined

WhatWhat: Dogfuck Rapeworld meets Romeo and Juliet. Billionaire omega werewolf Everett Grenwald must accept a suitor and mate for life in order to please his father, but the suitor his father has selected (Kristoff Zambardo) is repulsive, and besides, Everett has never gotten over his boyhood crush on lowborn alpha Trent Varen–who just happens to be Zambardo’s bodyguard.

If that all sounds a lot like a Harlequin romance, just remember there’s shapeshifting and knotting in this, which rarely show up in category romances.

Money Quotes:

“I’ve been looking forward to our union,” he shouts, trying to sound seductive over the sound of the engine. I give him a forced smile, and whirls around dramatically in a lame attempt to look cool. (loc 97)

I see his head snap back and bang hard against the wall and he crumples to a heap, unconscious. “And fuck you too,” I say, then I lift up my hind leg and piss on him. (loc 1190)

Verdict: This really, really did remind me of romance novels, and I unexpectedly found myself getting caught up in Trent and Everett’s relationship. The knotting was less obtrusive in this one, somehow. Possibly I’m developing immunity.

Also, Canis Blackfang is still the best possible pseudonym for Omegaverse stuff.

review: Deep South Wolves: Smoky Mountain Pack

Title: Deep South Wolves: Smoky Mountain Pack

Author: Kaden Mallory

deep south wolves 1

WhatWhat: The Bashan Pack have moved to the foothills of the Great Smoky Mountains to get further away from humans. Two young male shifters, Kage and Jason, have sex up in Jason’s new bedroom before sneaking out.

Money Quotes:

Mostly, he smelled their dinner from several hours earlier: pot roast with fresh herbs, greens out of the neglected garden, cornbread cooked in an iron skillet lined with bacon, Delilah’s dandelion tea with honey and cream. (loc 18)

Kage began to release him, then shoved back in, wet cock rubbing over Jason’s lips and cheek. Gasping, Jason followed unspoken orders by squeezing down his shaft, then licking him clean. (loc 120)

Verdict: This is more lushly written than most kindleporn, and the worldbuilding unwinds more slowly, most likely because this is the first installment of a series (there are at least five more that I’ve seen). The result is a high standard of writing, and a slight soap-opera feel as we await further developments.

DNF: Omega: Destined to the Alpha

This is my first official DNF. There aren’t a lot of stories I don’t finish, and when I do I don’t usually mention them here at Lover, Raptor, Gentleman. Since not finishing a story is usually a matter of personal taste–a bad fit between myself and the stories kinks, tropes, or setting–it doesn’t seem worth reviewing something I just didn’t click with.

But there is a lot of Omegaverse fiction out there right now, and wading through the torrents of werewolf cum can be difficult. It’s worth weeding the field, I think. So this is my first DNF report. I’m not using the author’s name in my tags or categories, because it’s entirely possible that at some stage an editor or proofreader got onboard and improved matters, and if so, I don’t think linking other stories to this one is necessary.

But this one? Yikes.

omega destined to the alpha

Title: Omega: Destined to the Alpha

You know, I should have guessed from the awkwardly-worded title that there were problems ahead, but when I downloaded it I’d convinced myself that maybe there were just too many things titled “destined for the alpha” already.

Author: Aiden Bates

WhatWhat: After a blowjob and the resultant car crash, Michael wakes with a handsome stranger staring at him. He knows nothing about this man, but thinks of him as “The Alpha,” and is soon in a car with him having sex again. According to the summary on Amazon there is mpreg in this, but I quit before that point.

Money Quotes:

The Alpha looked down and his cock wriggled at the soft of the boy’s big lips wrapped around it. (loc 48)

I don’t know what’s worse: the “soft”? The wriggling cock? The fact that the mention of big lips makes me picture a young Mick Jagger?

The Alpha but the Omega’s lip and laughed. Gabriel at the electric jolt of Gabriel pinching the boy’s nipples. (loc 122)

Shaka, when the walls fell.

Their eyes met and Andy felt a burst of ecstacy move up and down his body as warm milked streamed into the boy’s mouth. (loc 55)

The man turned around and walked out with his butt shaking sensuously. (loc 81)

Sadly, this is not a sex scene:

Michael didn’t like the way this man was shoving his way in. (loc 115)

Michael found himself nesting against the man’s shoulders before he caught himself and sat his head up straight. (loc 115)

“Nesting” and “nestling” are two different words, and unless Michael’s got a beak full of twigs, that’s the wrong one in that sentence. But that fades into insignificance next to the delightful insanity of “he sat his head up straight.”

Wonders of the Insect World:

The Omega’s moth was warm and soft. (loc 55)

Verdict: For the love of kindleporn, hire an editor, or suck off someone literate in exchange for beta-reading.

review: The Doctors and the Omega: Shifter Fertility Exam

Title: The Doctors and the Omega: Shifter Fertility Exam

Author: Canis Blackfang

the doctors and the omega

WhatWhat: Everett is desperate to come up with the rent money, and lucky for him he lives in dogfuck rapeworld the omegaverse, and he’s an omega, so all he has to do is participate in a fertility experiment. Yay?

I’m not going to lie to you: when I recently reviewed Night Shifter Nurses, I horrified various and sundry friends and family SO MUCH that I immediately vowed to inflict more Omegaverse on them, and Canis Blackfang has hands-down the best covers, titles, and pseudonym in that subcategory, so here we are.

Money Quotes:

I was no longer a virgin. An alpha had dumped his semen into my omega womb. (loc 219)

The receptionist had sounded normal enough on the phone, a female werewolf, but I still had this paranoia that I was about to get slain for my kidneys. (loc 91)

I guess “normal” is relative.

It reminded me of when I was younger, richer and still being chased by all the prospective alpha mates. I let out a small sigh. If only I hadn’t played hard to get so much I might be mated now to some rich alpha and not be in this mess. (loc 98)

I know “heteronormativity” probably isn’t the word I want to apply here, since this is m/m omega shifter erotica, but holy crap, that sounded like the marriage advice I’ve heard from cynical women of my grandmother’s generation.

Verdict: A few typos and a painful absence of the Oxford comma, but neither were enough to throw me out of the story. If Omegaverse fic is your thing, or medical kink, you’ll enjoy this. If “omegaverse” is just a funny-looking word and you don’t actually know what I’m talking about, think of it as “involuntary BDSM wolves” and try it anyway.

The fertility test, by the way? “You can tell by the taste,” apparently. (loc 152)

review: The Doctors and the Omega: Night Shifter Nurses

Title: The Doctors and the Omega: Night Shifter Nurses

Author: Canis Blackfang

doctors and the omega

WhatWhat: Omega (and shifter) Farrel is in the hospital, being treated for his inability to shift. Doctor Kassel is an Alpha, and he has the cure. It’s sex. Of course it is.

…What? If “Omega” and “Alpha” sound unfamiliar to you, I’m guessing you’re not in fandom, because Omegaverse has pretty much invaded fanfiction everywhere. My favourite shorthand for Omegaverse is “dogfuck rapeworld,” because while there are an infinite number of variations, most center around combinations of shifting, knotting, involuntary heat cycles, and mpreg.

WHAT. Sorry. I can’t help with any anguish (or, I suppose, delight) Omegaverse virgins might experience on first reading about this. No one can. You’re lost to decent society now. Bring plenty of water and healthy snacks.

That’s Not How Knotting Works:

He was leading me to his den, his knotted alpha cock engorged and ready to plunge into my fertile omega asshole. (loc 22)

Look, I hardly want to set myself up as an expert here, but I’m pretty sure the “knotted” part shouldn’t happen until he’s already up your virgin omega asshole.

Which KIND of Fuzzy, Though?

“Sleep,” the nurse said, his face going fuzzy. (loc 40)

Money Quote:

Electricity shot through my body as without warning, Doctor Kassel’s cock flexed and swelled, and I felt a thick hot load of alpha semen shoot deep into my omega womb. My eyes rolled back into my head, and to my shock, I felt my wolf tail explode out from above my ass. My wolf ears popped out from my head, and I couldn’t stop myself from cumming right then and there. (loc 292)

I defy you to get that mental image out of your head. Like, ever. Also, no wonder American medical care is so expensive. It’s really…thorough.

Verdict: I’ve been riding this pretty hard, but honestly, it was generally well-written and disturbingly hot. I know, I live among the damned now. But in spite of how amused I was to find a fandom trope roaming free among the Kindleporn, this author has done a damned good job of translating it to original fiction.