review: Omega for the Dragon Rockstar

Okay, so I was completely wrong about what I thought this was going to be. I thought maybe this would be the down-and-dirty dragon equivalent of all those Omegaverse wolf stories. It is Omegaverse, I guess, but this isn’t really erotica so much as erotic romance.

Title: Omega for the Dragon Rockstar

Author: TJ Cross

gomega for the dragon rockstar.jpg

WhatWhat: Sweetly gay American Kevin Acres gets picked up by rockstar Channing Joseph, whom he somehow fails to recognize and who he knows absolutely nothing about, including the part where he’s a dragon shifter. Actually the entire band are shifters of various kinds. They fall in insta-love and Channing knocks Kevin up, because why not.

Money Quotes:

“Eight centuries without committing myself to a single person has…left me strangely emotionally devoid. No, not empty… more like unlearned. I don’t know how it’s like to be with someone who I care for, who I want to be with,” Channing carefully said.

Kevin nuzzled his head under the alpha’s chin. “Then we’ll learn together.” (loc 1068)

As you can see, we’re firmly in fanfic territory here. Centuries of rugged aloofness, all over now that you’ve met this person who nuzzles you. Sure, it’s only been a couple of days, but it’s TRUE LOVE.

Male pregnancy is real, Kevin. The shifters call it Chosen — they’re miracle children, born from a very specific set of conditions that only two males can produce.”

“What conditions?”

“True love,” Channing murmured. Kevin was taken aback. (loc 1271)

Yeah, I’m a little taken aback too, considering you just implied women are incapable of true love.

He was starting to feel very maternal himself, knowing he was going to discover the first physical signs of his own pregnancy any moment now. (loc 1978)

Even most women I know aren’t quite this casual about pregnancy.

Verdict: This was in many ways adorable and sweet. Yes, it has explicit sex, but otherwise you could safely lend it to your maiden aunt. Assuming you wanted your maiden aunt to learn about dragon shifters and mpreg, that is, and for all you know she’s been writing explicit Kirk/Spock since before you were born, smartass.

This is definitely the fandom version of gay men, though, so if you’re an actual gay man it may well make you throw things at the wall. Also, some fandom damage (specifically the kind of casual misogyny that one finds in certain slash quarters) has crept in here.



review: Petra and the Wolf

Title: Pumpkin Spice: Petra and the Wolf

Author: Gigi Gericault

petra and the wolf

WhatWhat: A witch in search of the catalyst that will unleash her powers finds it, and it’s alive. Specifically, it’s a gorgeous wolf shifter named Dodger. They have sex.

Money Quotes:

Dodger caught her effortlessly, and she wrapped her legs around his tapered waist.

“You brute!” She panted against his parted lips.

“My witch,” he growled possessively, groping her ass through the light fabric of her dress. He dropped to his knees, still holding her flush against his body. (loc 118)

Verdict: This is definitely erotic romance (specifically “erotic paranormal romance,” I guess), not hardcore erotica. Nothing weird happens here, and there’s a definite happy-ever-after ending. I realize I’m using “nothing weird happens” to describe sex between a witch and a werewolf, but I’ve been at this a long time, and my palate’s jaded. This is sweet and romantic, and yes, erotic; perfect for the romance reader who likes a high “heat level” and wants a short Halloween read.

review: Deep South Wolves 2: Hunter’s Creek

Title: Deep South Wolves 2: Hunter’s Creek

Author: Kaden Mallory

deep south wolves 2

WhatWhat: Kage and Jason go to a gay bar to pick up a guy, only Jason is in wolf form (Kage explains this away as “he’s a service dog”). Kage fucks the guy under a bridge, and then Jason mounts him. Yes: the guy they pick up is in for not just surprise buttsex, but surprise bestiality.

Money Quotes:

Even as he was pulling out, Jason surged up onto the man’s back. He clamped both forepaws around Daniel’s waist.

“What the fuck?” Daniel, also breathless and wet with sweat, tried to scramble away.

Jason snarled and bit down on the back of Daniel’s neck, his head turned sideways for a firm hold. (loc 166)

Verdict: I’m amazed that this actually went to the dogdick place. I mean, I know all werewolf erotica and omegaverse stuff is damned close at the best of times, but this kicked it up a notch. Or a knot, I suppose.

review: Deep South Wolves: Smoky Mountain Pack

Title: Deep South Wolves: Smoky Mountain Pack

Author: Kaden Mallory

deep south wolves 1

WhatWhat: The Bashan Pack have moved to the foothills of the Great Smoky Mountains to get further away from humans. Two young male shifters, Kage and Jason, have sex up in Jason’s new bedroom before sneaking out.

Money Quotes:

Mostly, he smelled their dinner from several hours earlier: pot roast with fresh herbs, greens out of the neglected garden, cornbread cooked in an iron skillet lined with bacon, Delilah’s dandelion tea with honey and cream. (loc 18)

Kage began to release him, then shoved back in, wet cock rubbing over Jason’s lips and cheek. Gasping, Jason followed unspoken orders by squeezing down his shaft, then licking him clean. (loc 120)

Verdict: This is more lushly written than most kindleporn, and the worldbuilding unwinds more slowly, most likely because this is the first installment of a series (there are at least five more that I’ve seen). The result is a high standard of writing, and a slight soap-opera feel as we await further developments.

DNF: Omega: Destined to the Alpha

This is my first official DNF. There aren’t a lot of stories I don’t finish, and when I do I don’t usually mention them here at Lover, Raptor, Gentleman. Since not finishing a story is usually a matter of personal taste–a bad fit between myself and the stories kinks, tropes, or setting–it doesn’t seem worth reviewing something I just didn’t click with.

But there is a lot of Omegaverse fiction out there right now, and wading through the torrents of werewolf cum can be difficult. It’s worth weeding the field, I think. So this is my first DNF report. I’m not using the author’s name in my tags or categories, because it’s entirely possible that at some stage an editor or proofreader got onboard and improved matters, and if so, I don’t think linking other stories to this one is necessary.

But this one? Yikes.

omega destined to the alpha

Title: Omega: Destined to the Alpha

You know, I should have guessed from the awkwardly-worded title that there were problems ahead, but when I downloaded it I’d convinced myself that maybe there were just too many things titled “destined for the alpha” already.

Author: Aiden Bates

WhatWhat: After a blowjob and the resultant car crash, Michael wakes with a handsome stranger staring at him. He knows nothing about this man, but thinks of him as “The Alpha,” and is soon in a car with him having sex again. According to the summary on Amazon there is mpreg in this, but I quit before that point.

Money Quotes:

The Alpha looked down and his cock wriggled at the soft of the boy’s big lips wrapped around it. (loc 48)

I don’t know what’s worse: the “soft”? The wriggling cock? The fact that the mention of big lips makes me picture a young Mick Jagger?

The Alpha but the Omega’s lip and laughed. Gabriel at the electric jolt of Gabriel pinching the boy’s nipples. (loc 122)

Shaka, when the walls fell.

Their eyes met and Andy felt a burst of ecstacy move up and down his body as warm milked streamed into the boy’s mouth. (loc 55)

The man turned around and walked out with his butt shaking sensuously. (loc 81)

Sadly, this is not a sex scene:

Michael didn’t like the way this man was shoving his way in. (loc 115)

Michael found himself nesting against the man’s shoulders before he caught himself and sat his head up straight. (loc 115)

“Nesting” and “nestling” are two different words, and unless Michael’s got a beak full of twigs, that’s the wrong one in that sentence. But that fades into insignificance next to the delightful insanity of “he sat his head up straight.”

Wonders of the Insect World:

The Omega’s moth was warm and soft. (loc 55)

Verdict: For the love of kindleporn, hire an editor, or suck off someone literate in exchange for beta-reading.

review: The Doctor Will See You Now

Title: The Doctor Will See You Now

Series: Bearapy

Author: Rosabel Darke

the doctor will see you now

WhatWhat: Since becoming a werewolf Theo has been avoiding intimacy with his wife, Samantha, so now the couple are seeking therapy from Doctor Drake Bennett, who is himself a bear shifter. He solves their problems by fucking Samantha in front of her husband. Sounds legit.

Money Quotes:

She spread her legs even wider, baring herself fully to the bear, and slowly rubbed her clit as she stared into his eyes, daring him. (loc 270)

Verdict: Bear erotica is a Thing, and I hear cuckhold stories are hugely popular, so this should do well. And I hope it does, because it was literate, entertaining, and clever. Not quite my kink, and I still liked it enough to want to read the sequels.

review: The Doctors and the Omega: Night Shifter Nurses

Title: The Doctors and the Omega: Night Shifter Nurses

Author: Canis Blackfang

doctors and the omega

WhatWhat: Omega (and shifter) Farrel is in the hospital, being treated for his inability to shift. Doctor Kassel is an Alpha, and he has the cure. It’s sex. Of course it is.

…What? If “Omega” and “Alpha” sound unfamiliar to you, I’m guessing you’re not in fandom, because Omegaverse has pretty much invaded fanfiction everywhere. My favourite shorthand for Omegaverse is “dogfuck rapeworld,” because while there are an infinite number of variations, most center around combinations of shifting, knotting, involuntary heat cycles, and mpreg.

WHAT. Sorry. I can’t help with any anguish (or, I suppose, delight) Omegaverse virgins might experience on first reading about this. No one can. You’re lost to decent society now. Bring plenty of water and healthy snacks.

That’s Not How Knotting Works:

He was leading me to his den, his knotted alpha cock engorged and ready to plunge into my fertile omega asshole. (loc 22)

Look, I hardly want to set myself up as an expert here, but I’m pretty sure the “knotted” part shouldn’t happen until he’s already up your virgin omega asshole.

Which KIND of Fuzzy, Though?

“Sleep,” the nurse said, his face going fuzzy. (loc 40)

Money Quote:

Electricity shot through my body as without warning, Doctor Kassel’s cock flexed and swelled, and I felt a thick hot load of alpha semen shoot deep into my omega womb. My eyes rolled back into my head, and to my shock, I felt my wolf tail explode out from above my ass. My wolf ears popped out from my head, and I couldn’t stop myself from cumming right then and there. (loc 292)

I defy you to get that mental image out of your head. Like, ever. Also, no wonder American medical care is so expensive. It’s really…thorough.

Verdict: I’ve been riding this pretty hard, but honestly, it was generally well-written and disturbingly hot. I know, I live among the damned now. But in spite of how amused I was to find a fandom trope roaming free among the Kindleporn, this author has done a damned good job of translating it to original fiction.